the big cleanup

as i mentioned earlier. i did wake up (at 1pm) to clean my stupid messed up room. the whole operation took 4 hours....

i cleaned and cleared my room. cleaning was easy although it involved shifting whatever was on my L-table off into somewhere and getting rid of the stupid wires which ensued :



after 2 pail changes of detergent and alot of dust later i had to wipe all the appliances one by one. (my favs were my ps2 and lcd monitor so i took extra care to wipe them) and since you take off your pants b4 ur underwear and put on ur underwear b4 ur pants i had to do the same to the whole damn table. dummies read : take off appliances--> clean table --> clean appliances --> put back appliances on table--> connect the cables.

now came the clearing part. it was harder as it involved throwing away stuff which i may be emotionally attached to and although i clean my room bi-annually i still have alot of junk cos either i can't bear to throw them away; or i'll have this stupid aunty thinking of "i may need it next time"

so i started with the 2 plastic boxes under my table. This time i had grown stronger. i managed to throw most of the stuff in it away.. camp books (screw the memories, most of the people prolly won't remember me anyway) test-tubes and other stuff from school (yes i was a cheeky one) toys etc

until i came across a sealed up pack titled "regrets". my first thought was "wtf? how come i had a pack of regrets hiding in my room (think lit guys lol) and thus i opened it..

fuck.



it was a pack of consolidated paraphernalia (ie notes, letters, photographs, a ring and a breakup letter) from my prev prev prev relationship. (well at least i was smart enough to not leave them around EVERYWHERE in the room i kept them in a pack) funny how it still existed although i've thought that i've thrown it away so many years ago. i thought back and wondered for awhile on what we could have been and shit..the feeling sucks. after reading the stupid breakup letter i realised (and remembered) that the reason why it didn't work out was cos she felt that i did not have enough time for her and didn't show her enough love. hmm.. come to think of it maybe i wasn't too obvious in those little actions of love (not that i'm superstitious i'm a damn aquarian and they aren't gd at expression) and shit and yeah maybe i was easily distracted (she did mention i did not hear her out when she called me and i was playing cs) but one things for sure i did love her. i realised i was retarded too cos i dun recall going back her. bastard right? we all make mistakes i guess. well at least i'll know what to take note of next time i have a girlfriend (if i ever have one right now there seems to be NO FUTURE.)

ah. fuckit. it's over 5 fucking years ago man

and so i tore and slashed and burned the happy meal pack to the high heavens
and got on with my life (clearing my room)
lit guys will prolly think "oh johnny's got rid of the chain that's binding him and maybe you're right cos i thought of that too

hmm i threw away alot of computer stuff and books which i thought i was being stupid cos i recall at one point of time i just bought books for the sake of buying and reading which meant buying books with no value like "flight of the eagles" ...wtf man how sad was i. and did i meantion i was sad enough to listen to backstreet boys and ott? FUCK. well. got rid of them.

all in all it was quite a happy day. 11 ntuc bagfulls of trash, 1 happy pack (the regrets pack) and 1 kg of dust (k i was kidding)

now i have to get a new watch for myself next month.
it's the last thing that's binding me.
right now, i'll just live for the moment.