melecholy

it's me again. just got back from a friend's place
i was suppossed to help him out with his com stuff but being the infidel
i failed once more
it's no big deal to fail but being who i am
i feel real pissed about it.
false hope wrecks tue heart we know
but how often do we really bother to disallw it to occur.

isn't it ironic

the standards placed by society all seem so politically correct
yet we do not bother about others feelings
the beggar on the street deserves our pity
but how often do we think otherwise
that maybe he got his fingers burnt in the green back
or the evils he'd committed in his life

another day another time
time is just a waste of time
caught in endless spiral
a cycle of life
it never ends , it never starts

terminal velocity

it's 2.58am...well according to my computer clock and i've just stopped playing ffx
i could have gone deeper into the game..but due to a car accident which i went to check out,
i figured i had to put myself in bed by 3.15am

the car which crashed was a cool black volkswagon golf.
urprisingly, most of the car was intact except for the left frontal end of the car which bent a traffic light as a result of the accident
not bad for a china made car you say?
cool.
anyway..it was really predictable..
imagine this:

you're playing ffx and at mt Gagazet trying to acquire Yojimbo when u hear the sound of fast accelaration from a bin center 200 metres away from your home
and then u expect the screeching of tyres
it comes
and then...you wait for the sound of crushed metal
you wait..and wait...
and surprisingly....it comes!

i'm not trying to be a sadist or evil person here...but face the facts....accidents are inevitable in life right
the guy was alright..he seemed shaken though (DUH)
and it was clear that he wasn't drinking.

then why the accident?
well life's a bitch and then you die
some damn thing always happens at the rightfully wrong time

work

this is what my desktop looks like right now....work is hell

isnt't it beautiful ?

(My) heart is swimming in words
formed by the wind.
(My) voice carried
by a cloudy tommorrow.

A mirror moved
by the moon, trembled my heart.
Soft tears
filled with a stream of stars.

Isn't it beautiful?
Two of us walking hand in hand.
I want to go to
your town, your home, your arms.

I dream of lying
against your chest.
My body in your clasp,
disappearring into the evening.

Words stopped by the wind
are a gentle illsion.
A cloud-torned tommorrow is
a far-away voice.

My heart has been
in a moon-blocked flowing
mirror.
Stars that swayed and flowed
can't hide my tears.

Isn't it beautiful?
Two of us walking hand in hand.
I want to go to
your town, your home, your arms.

I dream of your face
that softly melts in the
morning.

withdrawal symptoms

i am beginning to experience withdrawal symptoms from FFX.
and it's only freaking 10:16am!

that very existence

ffx has surely spoilt my brain.
this time the story is based on a group of helpless humans wanting to kill "Sin"
the sole enemy which has been terrorizing mankind for many years
everytime they kill Sin, it get's reborn. if that is the case
what is the very use of trying.

anyway like all ff games it has questioned existence.
what is our very existence on this earth for
were we put here for a purpose ...
or do we shout and scream to emphasize our existence which would fail to exist at any moment?
how are destiny,fate,chance , life,death,existence related
do any of the above really exist?
i am still searching.
but the more i search, the more messed up it becomes.
so why search...