arbitary solace

here i am sitting in a spacious hall at a friend's place
with 4 jokers areound me either focused on the sony black box right in front of me
or on the 14 inch ACER monitor
i don't know why i am up at such an ungodly hour
i don't know why am i actually here
i don't know what am i going to do right after i complete this entry
but all i do know is that
it's great to be away from home

it's funny how parents can still hold such tight constraints on a 19 year old
so funny that i term it strange
in the beginning i thought that my parents were complete bitches
perpetually bitching me and "running" my life
but it is only until today, tonight
that i realise that there are people worse off than me
it's true that maturity is an essential aspect in a parent's trust for a child
it is also true that maturity does not come with age
but little do most parents know that they have to put their child's life on the anvil
to be forged and shaped by the furnace of life in order to grow

not many people think the way like me
i do not blame them
neither do i blame myself
for that makes up a person's individuality
for without it
humans would be mere robots of society

what is life actually
birth, childhood,school,work,marriage,family,birth,death
is it that cyclic or is it worth more
it is all up to us

the path of life has already been planned
the outcome destined
is is only the journey that is unknown

not many people may see things the way i do
some may term me eccentric,weird,spastic or downright cynical
but hey
that's me, johnny