goodbye to my home. goodbye tomy life

this is the first time i have ever waken up at such an early hour ever since my holidays started in mid april. it shall however also be the first day i enter into the police academy. many thoughts fill my ever saturated mind right now as i try to construct this entry. for a start i would not be returning home until the 8th of august.

many things await me at pa. new friends, opportunities as well as challenges. the first hurdle would however be figuring out where to go once i reach that dreaded place. all i know is that the days of waking up at 3pm everyday are gone...well at least for 20 weeks. i can never roam the land as freely as i used to be.

many thanks be to those who supported me just before i enter pa. you will always be remembered as the few good friends who stood by me. for now i wish you well.

goodbye to my home.
goodbye to my life.

the last day of freedom

today is my last day of freedom before i begin my 20-week ns prep training into oblivion
somehow somewhere inside of me wants to go all out into having a full fledged day of fun by completing whatever things i had always wanted to do before ns. however, another part of me just wants to sit in my set apart space at home dwelling in solace getting prepared for the big day tomorrow because there's no escaping the day tomorrow. the former would just be running away from it. in my view ns would be fun though its the initial making of friends that would be hard oh well. 21 hours left.

my friends have been abducted

woke up this morning to find that my icq had 5 regular online names instead of 10.
well done. 4 of my friends have been abducted and 1 has gone to work

slowly my world is crumbing

farewell to carpe diem

counting the remaining days i have left to ns jail
there aren't many. only 7 days
i do recall the times when i was just waking up at this shameful hour just getting ready for school
or just waking up at hours later than this just to skip school
all these have now passed and are merely just a record in my memory
gone are the days of endless reverie and nights of muse

freedom was just a memory

why do i feel so sad

yesterday was a day of madness
2 rabbit cages, 3 habitrail space stations, 3 metal hamster cages and 7 medium sized pet habitat containers were all crammed into my dad's car to be cleared off at a number of pet shops around the island.
in the end almost everything was cleared off except for 2 breeding pairs of rodents and a few other critters. crazy day i must say
anyway, although we managed to pack the animals into the car, sell them off, wash the cages etc, have a so-so dinner and met up with old friends; (we as in me and satan child) i somehow feel a prescence of despair in me. as if something was missing. something which i always wanted to do, could do but have not done it. what a fucked up feeling right
damn if only i knew what was missing. probably i wouldn't be blogging right now.

suikoden

i just completed suikoden in less than 2 weeks
a week earlier then what my bet with a friend stated

the facts :

operation: complete suikoden 3 in 14 days
status : completed
date of completion 13th july 2003 0600 hrs
total airtime 72 hrs 39 secs

technically ended at 0430 hrs

6 characters

3 main : chris, hugo, geddoe
1 shithead : thomas
1 nonsense : koroku (dog)
1 bonus if you collected 108 stars : luc but basically it just wastes 1.5 hrs

death again

blogger is seriously screwed
my previous entries failed to be published

so shall it be whatsoever it 's free anyway
and free stuff usually satisfies the basic needs of the client

anyway yesterday another death was reported
yes my other rare snakehead died
not because of parasites
but extreme wounds inflicted by a low-life luohan
believe me i will avenge its death

tragedy

the car was a total wreck when we arrived at the scene of the accident
glass and firebreglass debris from both cars could be clearly seen at the surrounding
areas on the road where the two cars collided.
the driver in the other car had already been taken to hospital.
no wonder they said speeding was the no. 1 road killer

idiots should be no. 2 cos no matter how safe you are
there will always be someone to fuck you up.

death

i lost one of my rare snakeheads this morning to a fucking parasite
well at least i know ocean free products are useless
all i can do right now is look for a replacement to accompany the other one that's left
fuck parasites
fuck ocean free

nice

my exam results were out early this morning. was kinda surprised when i got an A for my fyp as my supervisor was quite demanding of my project and often said i could do better than the current standard. I guess he was steering me thru the direction of an a grade. thanx mr supervisor although i know you will never read this entry. well i guess i can really go all out tohave fun b4 i go for stupid ns now. hopefully i don't die b4 i go in

oh really

i was bored (as always) and stumbled uppon this trash :


Sunset - You are the spark of inspiration, the fuel
of the imagination, and the essence of
destruction. You are one of intense emotion
and passion, a creator and a destroyer.


When are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

nice.

the words i feel

I've been watching you awhile
Since you walked into my life
Monday morning, when first I heard you speak to me
I was too shy to let you know
Much too scared to let my feelings show
But you shielded me and that was the beginning

Now at last we can talk
In another way
And though I try, I love you,
Is just so hard to say
If I only could be strong
And say the words I feel

My bleeding heart begins to race
When I turn to see your face
I remember that sweet dream
Which you told to me
I wanted just to be with you
So we could make the dream come true
And you smiled at me and that was the beginning

Now at last we can talk
In another way
And though I try, I love you,
Is just so hard to say
If I only could be strong
And say the words I feel

Tell me what you're thinking of
Tell me if you love me not
I have so much I long to ask you
But now the chance has gone
When your picture fades each day
In my heart the memory stays
Though we rant, you're always smiling
And I will hold it long

the matrix reloaded

trust me.
after the screening of matrix reloaded
many more people will start their pseudo philosopical nonsense again.

bumming ard

it's been 22 days since my exams ended and i just realised that 22 days have just been wasted on bumming around. how time files when you're really having fun. so far over the past 3 weeks i've been madly rushing all over the country's various fish shops in my ever fervent search for exotic fishes. the search is over although i can't really say that i WOULD not be getting any more specimens for my tanks. Have been looking at a breed of cichlids which i've seen before but did not bother to read up on. they're called "apistos" do a search on them if you can bother.

right now my life's a big MESS. so many things to do but it's either i am too caught up with the mad fish craze or i'm tired or basically "nuah". if everything works out and if they really do (my plans) i should be getting a webhosted site soon and then the real blogging would begin.

game over

my game just ended at 1530 hrs today
somehow the exam paper wasn't as easy as it was perceived to be
"fuck!" was heard behind me when i received the paper
"shit!" at the other corner
geez...some last exam paper huh
hopefully i'll pass this damn exam AND my final year project
cos i never wnat to go back to ngee ann to study again
right now all i can do is enjoy while i can
june shall be my judgement come

final heaven

this is it
the end of the road
the fork which meets the bend
tomorrow is my final exam before i would be officially out of school
somehow i feel sad
not because i'm leaving
but because my polytechnic life wasn't what i initially imagined it to be when i first got the enrolment package from the school
true i made quite a number of friends here..but somehow disappointment manages to sink in
where i would go now, what would i do i guess it's all up to me
the 95 days of free time before i go into PA would definetly not be spent mainly on working
for it is one of those times when a person can legally rest and do what he wants in this shitty nation
(ok the other such time was after the o levels)
oh well, i'm bored i guess
whatever.

this is it

i just handed up my final year project report today
realising the fact that i forgot to add in a few important documents
whatever
it was only at that moment when i handed up the reports that i wondered.
is this it? my 3 years of crap ass poly life gone just like that?

i've about a week more in school before i am considered out of poly (graduated? i don't know)
this period of time would probably make me wonder if i really enjoyed my stay here.

i am a sinner

as i listen to the never ending printing sounds of my hp 948c printer
i can't help but feel guilty
guilty of the act of killing the trees and wasting ink
yes i am printing out my final year report's 3rd draft.
and this time it's a whooping 119 pages excluding the appendix
single sided double spaced-guess how many pieces of paper that would be..
i'm sorry earth..but if my sup wasn't fussy and commanded such high standards..perhaps the world would not be so warm now...

preparing for Grand Retour

final year project start date has ended
wireless technology project start date has ended
final year project programming period has ended
final year project demo has ended
wireless technology project demo has ended

now all's left is the final year report
and a wireless technlogy exam
and Grand Retour would be born

......

woke up this morning with a sorethroat.
me : wat's for lunch ?
mum : fried rice.
me :fuck.
mum : fuck y?
me : i have a sorethroat
dad cuts in.
dad : got fever anot if got fever better see doctor!
me : i have SARS dun worry
silence.